Friday, December 18, 2015

Shakespearean Santa funny comedy duologue for 2 actors

"Shakespearean Santa" by D. M. Larson
Duologue for 2 Actors

 SANTA
 I am Santa who is as merry as the day is long. Friends, Elves, reindeer, lend me your ears: I come to save Christmas, not to miss it. A reindeer, a reindeer my kingdom for a reindeer! 

 (SANTA looks around) 

 SANTA (continued)
Rudolf! Rudolf! Wherefore art thou Rudolf? I am round like the moon and your nose is bright as the sun. 

 RUDOLF 
To be a reindeer or not to be a reindeer - that is the question. 

 SANTA 
Is that a red nose I see before me? 

 (RUDOLF tries to hide his nose) 

 RUDOLF 
Out out red nose! 

 SANTA 
Now is the winter of our discontent. Rough winds do shake the darling icicles of December and winter’s lease hath all too long a date. A storm blinds us to the world around us and I have but one wish - for you to guide my sleigh tonight.

RUDOLF 
Alas I am but one reindeer. 

 SANTA 
 This is your moment rudolf - there comes a moment in everyone’s lives where they have a chance to make a difference. 

 RUDOLF 
 Alas I am but a freak - a monster! Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor reindeer, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. 

 SANTA 
This above all: to thine own self be true. 

 RUDOLF 
What’s in a nose? A nose by any name would smell as well. 

SANTA 
To thine own self be true. 

 RUDOLF 
All that glisters is not gold. 

 SANTA 
You are a reindeer - a special reindeer - We know what we are, but know not what we may be. 

RUDOLF 
Then why would they not let me play any reindeer games and why would they call me names 

SANTA 
If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you give us cookies do we not eat? 

 RUDOLF 
My nose is one that glowed not wisely but too well. 

 SANTA 
Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them. Help us and You will go down in history. 

 RUDOLF 
Though this be madness, there is method in it. 

 SANTA 
We are such stuff as dreams are made on, and my tummy is rounded with a snack. 

 RUDOLF 
Then we shall fly and save Christmas. 

(RUDOLF and SANTA do a high five and leave determined) 

 END OF PLAY

***

Purchase a PDF of the monologue and duologue at https://sellfy.com/p/6s9kmg/


****************
COPYRIGHT
These scripts are published and protected by Copyright (c) 2019.

When you purchase a PDF, you may make as many photocopies as needed (but please do NOT repost the text online in any way).

Purchasing a PDF of this script gives you the rights to use for:

Auditions

Classrooms

Workshops

Camps

If you use the script in a paid performance where admission is charged or in a competition, please pay the royalty:

https://sellfy.com/p/1MQC/

This royalty covers all performances that occur within one month’s time.

IMPORTANT: Please be sure to get permission from your competition for the script before performing it.








Find more free duologues at http://www.freedrama.net/small2.html

Thursday, December 17, 2015

"Mess Things Up" monologue for female from a published play - solo stage play script for woman

"Mess Things Up" is a monologue adapted from the published play "Flowers in the Desert" ISBN-13: 978-1494806217.  It is written for a teenage female actress and runs about 2-3 minutes.


"MESS THINGS UP"
by D. M. Larson

"Why do I always do this? 
Why do I always Mess things up."


Read the monologue at:

http://www.freedrama.net/messup.html
***



Art by Shiela Larson





Monday, December 14, 2015

Best Short Monologues for November 2015 - Solo Scripts 1 Minute or Less

These are the most popular short (1 minute or less) free monologues from Freedrama.net during November 2015:

Wishing - Female
http://www.freedrama.net/wishing.html

Cassandra - Female - Comedy
http://www.freedrama.net/monocasandra.html

Beauty and Perfection - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/monoshelly.html

Nervous - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/nervous.html

Kill First Gloat Later - Male - Comedy
http://www.freedrama.net/killfirst.html

Hope - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/monograce.html

Flowers from Phil - Male - Comedy
http://www.freedrama.net/monophil.html

Perfectly Ugly - Female - Overdramatic
http://www.freedrama.net/perfectugly.html

Catchick - Female - Comedy
http://www.freedrama.net/catchick.html

First Words - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/firstwords.html

Staying Power - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/stayingpower.html


"Kryptonite Jewelry" Scene for 3 Actors from the published play Blinded by the Knight

"KRYPTONITE JEWELRY" a scene selection by D. M. Larson
for 3 actors from a published play

JOE
You like kryptonite jewelry huh?

ASHLEY
As long as it is big and flashy, I like it lots.  Where's the little princess's room?

JOE
Back down the hall.  Look for the Supergirl poster.

ASHLEY
How come it is super-girl and then super-man?  Isn't that sexist?

JOE
Uh... sure.

ASHLEY
Well, stop doing that.

JOE
Yeah... I'll call my friends at DC comics right now and get them to change that.

ASHLEY
Good.  See, that's why I won the title Miss Politically Correct last year.

JOE
How many people were in that contest?

ASHLEY
Doesn't matter.  The important thing is that the right person won.

(Ashley exits.  Howard rushes over to Joe and lowers his comic)

HOWARD
Is that who I think it is?

JOE
Yup, that's Ashley Anderson, beauty queen.  Miss Teen Walla Walla, Miss Pet Lover, Miss Apple Pie... She's been the Miss of everything I think.

HOWARD
What is she doing here?

JOE
She's here to do a photo shoot. She's endorsing the store and then we're endorsing her.  See, they think she is a sure thing to win Miss Washington this year and if she can win Miss America, then this sponsorship will be gold.  My online sales with skyrocket. And she gets someone to pay some of the bills.

HOWARD
But how?

JOE
She's my cousin.

HOWARD
You never told me that!

JOE
It's a family secret.  I'm rather embarrassed by her, but it might finally be useful to know her.

HOWARD
I've always wanted to talk to her.

JOE
You want to talk to any woman.

(Ashley comes out and Howard lifts his comic and goes to hide. Joe goes to the front door and locks it)

JOE (CONT.)
I better lock the door before the nerds start swarming.

ASHLEY
Ew... there's one now.  He's drooling on the window.

(Joe hands her some money)

JOE
Here's your money.  Be nice.

(Ashley smiles and waves and blows a kiss)

JOE (CONT.)
I think you just killed that one.

ASHLEY
Ready for the photo?

(Joe is looking around for the camera)

JOE
In a hurry?  Big plans tonight?

ASHLEY
My big plans are to be some where else.

(JOE finds camera)

JOE
I want you holding a wearing this sash and holding this comic book.

(Joe gives sash to Ashley)

ASHLEY
Miss All Knight?

JOE
It's the name of the store "All Knight Novelty."

ASHLEY
It sounds weird though.

JOE
And here is the comic.

ASHLEY
Ew!  I don't wanna hold that.  It's gross.

JOE
But she's where the store gets the name from... Knight Princess... she's a warrior princess.  I thought you liked princesses.

ASHLEY
But look at her outfit.  And what's she doing to that monster.

JOE
I believe she is ripping that zombie a new one.

ASHLEY
Ew!

JOE
I'll look for one with a better cover.

(Joe finds one)

JOE (CONT.)
Here we go.  She is all dressed up for her coronation.

(Joe sets up camera on tripod.  Ashley looks at comic)

ASHLEY
How can she fight in those clothes?  Guy always have tons of armor but the warrior women wear practically nothing to protect their bodies.

JOE
Good point.  I'll shoot off another email to my friends at DC comics.

END OF MONOLOGUE

***

From the scene "Blinded by the Knight"
in the published play "Between Good and Evil"


The Pain! from the Published Play Blinded by the Knight Free Two Person Scene Duologue

"THE PAIN!" a scene selection for two actors
from a published play by D. M. Larson

(HOWARD is a shy nerdy guy and ASHLEY is a young beauty queen. ASHLEY is temporarily blinded by some unknown substance and HOWARD is taking care of her)

HOWARD
Hi.

ASHLEY
Thanks for being here to help, Howard. I hope you're not that creepy guy outside that drooled on the window when he saw me?

HOWARD
No.

ASHLEY
Oh, good.  So how come I don't remember you from school?

HOWARD
I... I don't know.

ASHLEY
You're shy.  That's why.  I think that's so cute.

HOWARD
Oh...

ASHLEY
Take my hand please and lead me to a chair.

HOWARD
Sure.

(Howard looks very happy to be holding her hand.  He walks her to a chair - a spot with two chairs and a table).

ASHLEY
You will take good care of me won't you Howard?

(Howard smiles)

HOWARD
Yes, of course.

ASHLEY
Thanks so much for helping me, Howard.  I must look terrible.

HOWARD
No, you look... good.

ASHLEY
You're so sweet.  Could you get my purse for me?  I might have eye drops in there.  That could help.

HOWARD
Do you remember where you left it?

ASHLEY
No.. silly me.. but I'm sure a smart guy like you can find it.

HOWARD
Okay...

(Howard searches around for purse as Ashley talks)

ASHLEY
It's nice having a guy around who is so helpful.  I could get used to having someone around who does things for me like this.  I don't mean like a servant but as my special little helper.  Especially if I'm blind now... you think I'll be blind forever?  I wonder if they have Miss Blind USA?  Or maybe I'd be a shoe-in for Miss America if I'm blind.  So this could be a blessing in disguise.  You could be up there on stage with me guiding me around... I wonder if that's against the rules... I could get a cute little guide dog.  People love animals too.  A blind girl with a dog.  I'd win for sure.  Still haven't found my purse?  I wonder where it went to.

I hope Joe didn't take it.  I have no clue why he would be you never know.  You're such a good listener.  I like that.  Most the guys I hang out with just want to talk about themselves.  They love talking about their bodies and their muscles and how they work out all the time or how they won the big game doing a touch basket or a win down or some such stupidity.  Don't you hate it when someone always talks about themselves non-stop?

(Howard sees the purse.  He goes up and gets it)

HOWARD
I found it.

ASHLEY
Great!  I knew you could do it.  Now find my eye drops.

(Howard pulls weird silly things from her purse like bows, ribbons, makeup, little stuffed animals until he finds them)

HOWARD
This kind of looks like eye drops but...

(Ashley reaches out and Howard gives it to her)

ASHLEY
That feels right.

HOWARD
You sure?  It has...

ASHLEY
Of course I'm sure silly.  Now let's see if this helps my eyes.

(Ashley puts in the drops. Pause.  Ashley screams.  Ashley jumps up and stumbles around in pain)

HOWARD
What happened?

ASHLEY
It burns!  My eyes are on fire!

(Ashley screams some more.  Howard tries to grab her and calm her down but she keeps punching him and knocking him down)

ASHLEY
The pain!

END OF SCENE


***

From the scene "Blinded by the Knight"
in the published play "Between Good and Evil" by D. M. Larson



Serious Dramatic Monologues for Actors - Most Popular Top Solo Scripts from November 2015

These are the most popular seriously dramatic monologues from Freedrama.net during November 2015:

Wishing - Female
http://www.freedrama.net/wishing.html

The Not So Perfect Child - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/notperfect.html

A Breaking Heart - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/breakheart.html

Beauty and Perfection - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/monoshelly.html

Demons - Male or Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/demons.html

Nervous - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/nervous.html

Much Madness - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/madness1.html

Hope - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/monograce.html

Only Children Believe in Butterflies - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/butterflies.html

Sob Story - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/sobstory.html

Mess Things Up - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/messup.html

First Words - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/firstwords.html

Staying Power - Female - Serious
http://www.freedrama.net/stayingpower.html

Monday, December 7, 2015

Freedrama Theme Song

Vote for your favorite Freedrama theme song! 

Post below which song you like better as the Freedrama theme song.



Learn more about Freedrama at http://www.freedrama.net

Fairy Godfather funny monologue for male - short solo stage play script

"Fairy Godfather"
By D. M. Larson 

GODFATHER
Good evening.  I'm your fairy godfather.  I bet you didn't know  us godfairies were still in operation in the 21st century... we got fairies all over... just the other day my fairy godcousin Vinny got some kid their wish upon a star wish and now that kid is proud owner of one of them video game devices.  We're that good.  But you have to understand we're on a budget now... the darn economy.  Sure, I'd like to help all them poor little boys and girls get what they want, but hey... a fairy's gotta make a living too.  But you know, we always was focused on royalty... princes or princesses... We'd fix you up with a royal something or another... and then when you got your happily ever after, there was the bill... them stories never tell you about the bill.

END OF MONOLOGUE

***

For permission to use this play contact doug@freedrama.net

From the scene "Blinded by the Knight"
in the published play "Between Good and Evil"



Free Short Scenes and Skits for 2, 3 and 4 actors

Need a short scene for your classroom, workshop or acting competition?  Here are some options for actors:

"The Waiting Room" play for three actors from published play Death of an Insurance Salesman
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/10/the-waiting-room-play-for-three-actors.html

"The Boogie Man" 2 actors (1m 1f) from Death of an Insurance Salesman
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/10/the-boogie-man-2-actors-1m-1f-from.html

"Call for Help" scene for 2 male actors from Death of an Insurance Salesman
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/10/call-for-help-scene-for-2-male-actors.html

"Dead End Job" scene for 3 actors from Death of an Insurance Salesman
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/10/dead-end-job-scene-for-3-actors-from.html

"Okay Gang Let's Split Up" comedy scene for 3 actors from Death of an Insurance Salesman
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/10/okay-gang-lets-split-up-comedy-scene.html

"Gonna Scare Piggy" short scene for 2 actresses - 2 people - two females - from published play Flowers in the Desert
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/06/gonna-scare-piggy-short-scene-for-2.html

"Waiting for Christmas" free short stage play script by D. M. Larson for 4 or more actors - new original short play
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/11/waiting-for-christmas-free-short-stage.html

"Black Friday Selfie" duologue short play for 2 actors - new original
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/11/black-friday-selfie-duologue-play-for-2.html

"You and Me, Alone and Free" stage play script for 3 actors by D. M. Larson - new original short play
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/09/you-and-me-alone-and-free-stage-play.html

"Take Notes Ladies" short funny scene 4 actors from comedy stage play script Operation Redneck (3 f 1 m)
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/06/take-notes-ladies-short-funny-scene-4.html

"The Ultimate Redneck" short comedy scene for 3 actors - 1 male 2 female - from the play Operation Redneck
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/06/the-ultimate-redneck-comedy-scene-for-3.html

"Little People" a comedy scene for 2 actors (1 male 1 female) from the play Operation Redneck
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/11/little-people-comedy-scene-for-2-actors.html

"The Little Boy Who Likes Beer" short comedy scene for 3 actors  from the play Operation Redneck
http://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/11/the-little-boy-who-likes-beer-short.html

For more free short scenes at http://www.freedrama.net/short.html

Free short comedy scenes: http://www.freedrama.net/shortc.html

Free short scenes for kids: http://www.freedrama.net/childshort.html

Hippies, Housewives and Watering Holes short free comedy play script for 3 actors - 1 male 2 female

HIPPIES, HOUSEWIVES, AND WATERING HOLES

By

D. M. Larson



Copyright (c) 2002

All Rights Reserved



This script is copyrighted material. You are not allowed to repost the script online for any reason (even educational).

If you charge admission, there is a royalty fee. Please go to www.freedrama.net/royalty.html for more information.



CAST OF CHARACTERS


LEROY: Old Texas rancher who is protecting his watering hole

MOLLY: His quiet housewife

MOON: A hippy who comes along to give Leroy a hard time about his habit of shooting things he shouldn't





PLACE and TIME


A ranch in modern day Texas.



READ THE SCRIPT AT:

http://freedrama.net/hhwh.html

OR

For more free play scripts go to http://www.freedrama.net!

Thursday, December 3, 2015

Free stage play scripts, monologues, duologues, shorts, skits, games and more

Freedrama.net has many great free resources for actors, teachers, students and directors all for FREE!

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Free MONOLOGUES for 1 Actor

Free Monologues for one TEEN Actor

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Funny Comedy Monologues

Free DUOLOGUES for 2 Actors

Free ONE ACT Plays

Free One Act and Full Length Plays for CHILDREN

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Short Plays for CHILDREN

Full Length Plays

SMALL Cast Plays for THREE Actors, FOUR Actors, FIVE Actors, SIX Actors

Small cast plays for CHILDREN

Free Online ACTING School and Tips for New Actors

IMPROV Theatre Games

MadScripts Fill in the Blank Classroom GAMES

Classroom Ideas for TEACHERS

free stage play scripts

Copyright and Royalty

These scripts are published and protected by Copyright (c) 2001-2021.



When you purchase a PDF, you may make as many photocopies as needed (but please do NOT repost online in any way).



Purchasing a PDF of this script gives you the rights to use for:

Auditions

Classrooms

Workshops

Camps



If you use the script in a paid performance where admission is charged or in a competition, please pay the royalty:



https://sellfy.com/p/1MQC/



This royalty covers all performances that occur within one month’s time.



IMPORTANT: Please be sure to get permission from your competition for the script before performing it.