Saturday, September 8, 2018

"Heroes and Happiness" scene for 4 actors male or female from the play "Superhero Support Group"

"HEROES AND HAPPINESS"
scene from
"Superhero Support Group"

DOCTOR
The weight of the world is off her shoulders.  She's happy now.

SHADE
Being a hero isn't about happiness.

DOCTOR
Then what is it about?

SHADE
It's about changing the world and making it a better place.

DOCTOR
And have you changed the world?  Is it a better place?

SHADE
Well, not yet.

DOCTOR
Anyone can change the world.  You don't have to have superpowers.

SHADE
I am sooo tired of hearing about that Batguy.  Give me a few billion dollars for gadgets and I'd be pretty powerful too.

DOCTOR
I'm saying that ordinary people can make a difference in this world.

(The heroes look at each other a moment and then laugh)

SHADE
Ordinary people... making a difference?  HA!

DOCTOR
What about teachers, nurses, police officers?  They all make a difference.

SMACK
Uh...

DOGBOY
She's got a point.

SHADE
Don't listen to her.  She's twisting your minds.

DOCTOR
Or maybe I'm the hero and I'm the one fixing problems.

SMACK
Uh... I hate thinking.  My brain hurts.  Too much talking.  Not enough smiting.

SHADE
Blah, blah, blah... her words will destroy us!

DOCTOR
Or maybe they'll make you better.

SHADE
You'll have to catch me first.

(Shade jumps behind chairs again)

DOCTOR
So who's next?

DOGBOY
Will the world really be okay without Supers?

DOCTOR
It's time for the world to solve their own problems.

DOGBOY
People are so demanding.  Always wanting more and more.  Now they just expect me to help.  They hardly ever say thank you anymore.

SMACK
Lift this, crush that, open that jar... I feel so used sometimes.

DOGBOY
A friendly thank you would do or even a nice greeting card.

SMACK
Or cookies.  I wish someone would bake me some cookies.  That would be all the thanks I need.

(Dogboy and Smack start to tear up)

DOCTOR
Supers are the ultimate co-dependents.  Always looking for problems.  Never happy if there isn't a crisis.  Getting themselves involved with demanding citizens who don't appreciate them for who they are.  You can never do enough to please them.

(Dogboy and Smack are crying loudly now)

DOGBOY
It's true.  It's never enough.

DOCTOR
Come in, friends.  We'll take care of all this for you.  No more stress.  No more worries.

(Doctor takes Dogboy and Smack in to office.  Shade comes out of hiding)

SHADE
And then there was one.  We have finally met our match.

END OF SCENE



from

"Superhero Support Group" 
ISBN-13: 978-1540471772

Book: 

PDF: 

"Can't Fly" short scene for 3 actors male or female from Superhero Support Group

"Can't Fly"
scene from 
"Superhero Support Group"

(Caper starts to go but Smack grabs him.  Shade comes out)

SMACK
The doctor took your powers!

CAPER
I think so.

SHADE
Try flying.

CAPER
No, I promised.

SHADE
Get on that chair and try.

CAPER
I don't want to go back in there.  I promised never to fly again. I won't do it.  Please don't make me. It was horrible.

SMACK
What did the doctor do?

CAPER
I can't say.  It... it was too terrible.

SHADE
Get on that chair.  I must know if she really took your powers.

CAPER
No.

SHADE
Do it or else.

CAPER
Or else what?

SHADE
I'll haunt you until the day you die.  You know I can be pretty scary.

CAPER
The doctor is scary.  You're just super annoying.  Fine.  Then you'll let me go?

SHADE
Of course.

(Caper gets on a chair.  They watch and Caper jumps and falls)

CAPER
There.  Happy?

SHADE
The Doctor did it.  She really can take our powers.

(Smack grabs Caper)

SMACK
Let's try the window to be sure.

(Smack throws Caper through a window.  He sticks his head out.  Caper screams.  Then there is a thud)

SMACK (Cont.)
Nope. Can't fly.

END OF SCENE


from

"Superhero Support Group" 
ISBN-13: 978-1540471772

Book: 

PDF: 

Monday, September 3, 2018

“Operation Redneck” comedy monologues and scenes

“Operation Redneck” 

ISBN-13: 978-1540824349 https://amzn.to/2PW2ZbU

First Performed by 
Retroact Productions in a Midwest Tour during Summer, 2004 


Or buy a low cost PDF of the play at:
https://sellfy.com/p/e4LY/


"Greenie (The Last Liberal)" monologue for female


"The Perfect Redneck" comedy scene for 2 actors (1 male 1 female)

https://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2016/03/the-perfect-redneck-comedy-scene-for-2.html


"Little People" a comedy scene for 2 actors (1 male 1 female) 

https://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/11/little-people-comedy-scene-for-2-actors.html


"High Horse" short monologue for female

https://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/11/high-horse-short-monologue-for-female.html

"Nowhere Fast" short monologue for woman

https://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2015/11/nowhere-fast-short-monologue-for-woman.html



"The Little Boy Who Likes Beer" short comedy scene for 3 actors



"The Rodeo Comes First" scene for 2 actresses 


"Game Boy" scene for 3 actors -  2 female 1 male from Operation Redneck 


This play is approved for use in Educational Theatre Association National Individual Events.

"Game Boy" scene for 3 actors - 2 female 1 male from Operation Redneck

"Operation Redneck" is the story of three friends (Julie, Beth and Tina) who are roommates. Julie is dating a city boy named Jacob and he wants to visit her in the small town she lives in.  She is worried about him fitting in and everyone want to help Jacob by turning him into the ultimate redneck like Tina's boyfriend JJ.    

“GAME BOY”
(scene from "Operation Redneck")

BETH: Let's see! First question... (Thinks of something) What's the most romantic thing you've ever done for Tina?

JJ: Romantic? Uh... probably that time I spray painted her name on the General Lee Street Overpass. (TINA smiles happily)

TINA: That was something. You coulda been killed. He used real big letters too. 

BETH: Too bad he spelled her name wrong.

TINA: It's the thought that counts.


BETH: I mean who spells Tina with an E instead of an A.


JJ: Can we get on with this? I got things to do.

BETH: Have you ever invested anything for your future such as in the stock market? 


JJ: The stock market? Yeah, I might buy us a cow or two.

BETH: Are you the kind of person who would own a personalized license plate?


JJ: Any plate I get here is personalized to me.

TINA: Why's that?


JJ: Cause my daddy's one of them guys who makes them.


BETH: Isn't your dad in prison?


JJ: Yeah, so?


BETH: Do you own a three piece suit?


JJ: Got one on right now. Overalls, flannel shirt, and underwear.


TINA: And only sometimes on the underwear. (She and JJ laugh)


BETH: That's more than I wanted to know, Tina. Who is your favorite Uncle? 

JJ: My dad.


BETH: What do you do when you're in trouble and need to find a way out?


JJ: I think, "What would Homer Simpson do?"


BETH: What is your favorite Olympic sport?


JJ: Mud wrestling.


BETH: That's not an Olympic sport.


JJ: Well, it should be.


BETH: Next question. What do you think of gun control?


JJ: Gun control is a steady hand.


BETH: Do you know how to use the internet?


JJ: The internet? That some kind of new fishing tool?


BETH: If you could pick the eighth wonder of the world, what would you chose? 

JJ: The Budweiser plant outside of town.


BETH: Which family member do you want to be like when you get older? 

JJ: My mama.


TINA: Really?


JJ: Yeah. You know how many tattoos she's got?

BETH: No, and I don't want to know.


JJ: (Stands and shows TINA. Has back to audience) This one is my favorite. Mama's got the same one. 

TINA: That's a nice one.


JJ: It was expensive. I'm still paying this baby off.


BETH: Who do you admire most?


JJ: Jack Daniels. (He and TINA laugh)


BETH: What do you want to name your children?


JJ: Jack and Daniel.


BETH: You have a one track mind.


JJ: I sure am getting thirsty.


TINA: I think you left a bottle of JD in my room.


JJ: Boy, howdy. This is my lucky day. (exits)


BETH: I can't believe this.


TINA: How did he do?


BETH: Tina, the man is an idiot.


TINA: I thought he did very well.


BETH: Maybe I should call someone else. No one could pretend to be this dumb.

TINA: He ain't pretending. You just ain't givin' him a chance. Ask him one more and make it really hard. I bet he'll get it right.

JJ: (Returns from kitchen) We done with all them questions yet?

TINA: Just one more, honey.

BETH: What is your opinion on the Roe vs. Wade decision?

JJ: (Thinks. TINA looks hopeful) Now I've heard people talk about that a lot and that's something I've thought lots about too. But I think I've finally settled one side of that issue. I much prefer to row across a river than wade. (BETH throws her notes in the air) What? The river's way too cold to wade across.

BETH: This is totally hopeless. (exits)

JJ: What's with her?

TINA: Nothin'. You want another beer?

JJ: Oh, baby. You say the sweetest things. (grabs TINA and pulls her onto couch and kisses her. Stops and looks at her lovingly) You know what, baby doll?

TINA: What?

JJ: I wonder what's on TV?

TINA: JJ, can we talk?

JJ: Sure, I think there's a commercial coming up soon.

TINA: Now?

JJ: Jeez, woman. What's with this talking all the sudden? That ain't like you. You know, that's the problem with you living with all these chics. You get to yacking and soon you can't stop.

TINA: Sorry, JJ. I don't know what I was thinking.

JJ: Thinking, too much of that is bad too.

TINA: You're right, sorry.

JJ: Okay, fine. There's the commercial. Let's talk. I don't like it when you get all pouty. Makes your face all puffy.

TINA: Would you do anything for me?

JJ: Anything? I don't know. Depends.

TINA: On what?

JJ: Well, I'd walk through a mile of manure but I wouldn't lick a cow's behind.

TINA: That's fair I guess.

JJ: What about you? Would you do anything for me?

TINA: Of course.

JJ: Would you, stick your finger up a pig's nose?

TINA: Uh-huh.

JJ: (Pause. Thinks) Would you fling a turd at the mayor?

TINA: Gladly.

JJ: Would you be willing to say you had flung a turd at the mayor even if you didn't do it?

TINA: Yeap.

JJ: Even if it meant that it would get you in big trouble?

TINA: JJ?

JJ: Yeah?

TINA: Did you fling a turd at the mayor today?

JJ: (Sheepish) Yeah.

TINA: (Laughs) I can't believe you.

JJ: Aw, crud. I missed the ending of my show. Now I'll never know if Bo and Luke get away.

TINA: I'm sorry, Jellybean. Would you like to use my game boy? That always cheers you up.

JJ: Okay.

TINA: (Gets gameboy) You have to use the headphones though. Beth hates the noises it makes.

JJ: Fine. I can't stand hearing all you girls yacking anyway. Tell Beth I don't like her noises either. (Puts on headphones and plays)

END OF SCENE

****

“Operation Redneck” 
ISBN-13: 978-1540824349 https://amzn.to/2PW2ZbU
First Performed by 
Retroact Productions in a Midwest Tour during Summer, 2004 

Or buy a low cost PDF of the play at:

https://sellfy.com/p/e4LY/

"The Rodeo Comes First" scene for 2 actresses from the play "Operation Redneck"

"Operation Redneck" is the story of three friends (Julie, Beth and Tina) who are roommates. Julie is dating a city boy named Jacob and he wants to visit her in the small town she lives in.  She is worried about him fitting in and everyone want to help Jacob by turning him into the ultimate redneck like Tina's boyfriend JJ.  
  
“The Rodeo Comes First” 
from the play "Operation Redneck"

JULIE: You haven't exactly had the most stable job history.

BETH: That's because I have my priorities. The rodeo comes first.

JULIE: When are you ever going to give up playing rodeo?

BETH: I'm not playing. I've made some serious money when I've won.

JULIE: And you haven't won in two years.

BETH: I'm planning a comeback. Meanwhile, I'm making decent money at the electronics store. Joe says he might make me assistant manager.

JULIE: If you sleep with him.

BETH: I'm considering it. Joe ain't that bad.

JULIE: Beth, you're way better than that. You're smart. You don't have to sink that low.

BETH: Smart huh? I haven't been called smart since high school. Sure, I got the same kind of grades you did back then, but my brain has been rotting away down here while yours was getting educated.

TINA: And those kicks to the head by them bulls at the rodeo haven't helped either.

JULIE: You could go back to school you know.

BETH: What for? All us girls do is get married and mooch off our husbands anyway. Why get educated?

TINA: Too true.

JULIE: I'm going to have to work on your attitudes. Maybe that's why I ended up back here. I'm meant to help give women a new outlook.

BETH: You can help by figuring out what I did to my bank account.

JULIE: So where is all your money going?

BETH: I think it's because I'm still paying off my car stereo.

JULIE: Your car doesn't even run. It's on cinder blocks.

BETH: I'm gradually paying to have it fixed up.

JULIE: And you started with the stereo?

BETH: That is vital to every car that is worth its salt.

JULIE: Unbelievable.

TINA: It is a nice stereo though.

BETH: You know it's good when you can't hear for an hour after using it.

END OF SCENE

****

“Operation Redneck” 
ISBN-13: 978-1540824349 https://amzn.to/2PW2ZbU
First Performed by 
Retroact Productions in a Midwest Tour during Summer, 2004 

Or buy a low cost PDF of the play at:
https://sellfy.com/p/e4LY/

Saturday, August 25, 2018

“Death of an Insurance Salesman” monologues and scenes for competition

“Death of an Insurance Salesman”

First performed by The AlphaNYC Theater Company
Corner Office Theater in Midtown Manhattan
February, 2016

Big Nose monologues and scene for competition

"Big Nose" 
A modern Cyrano de Bergerac stage play script for 7 or more actors.

ISBN-13: 978-1542471077 - https://amzn.to/2o8ieSr

First performed by the American School of Kosova in Pristina, Kosovo, December, 2003

Featured Duologue Scene - "You Look Amazing" (1 male 1 female):
https://freedramaplays.blogspot.com/2017/09/you-look-amazing-scene-for-2-actors-1.html

"Big Nose" is available for use in Educational Theatre Association National Individual Events:

Beauty IS a Beast monologues for competition

“Beauty IS a Beast” ISBN-13: 978-1511495967

Beauty might be beautiful on the outside, but she's ugly on the inside. See what happens when her fairy godmother turns her inside out. Check out this family friendly "Taming of the Shrew" type tale. This is a children's comedy stage play script for the whole family.

First performed by Bakersfield Community Theatre, Bakersfield, CA, February, 2006

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