This is a duologue for two actors - 1 teen male and 1 older female in her 30's.
For permission to use this script, contact doug@freedrama.net (please include the title "Find Yourself a Nice Girl" in the request.
"Find Yourself a Nice Girl"
by D. M. Larson
(The year is 1940. Billie Holiday is a singer in her dressing room after a show. She is getting freshened up. She sprays on some perfume. There is a knock at door)
Billie
There he is. Let's see who the fine gentleman is
who has been sending me gifts?
(She laughs when she sees Grant, who is a young teenager - He was trying to look very grown up so he is embarrassed by her laughter)
Billie
You're just a kid!
Grant
I'm not a kid. I'm nearly 16... in a year or two.
Billie
You look like you've hardly lived. All clean cut in those dandy clothes.
You look like you've never seen a sad day in your life. Let me see those hands.
Clean as can be. Not even an honest days work on those hands.
Those are little boy hands. And here you are waltzing in here like a man,
giving me grown up gifts like flowers and candy and perfume.
You know where I was at your age? Prison. I was locked up for being too stupid...
Or too greedy... To say no. I wish I could have said no.
Sometimes I wonder how it all got so bad.
Grant
But everything got better. Look at you now.
Billie
Yes, look at me.
(She does a sexy pose and he gets flustered)
Grant
You're successful. You're a star.
Billie
I know I've got at least one fan. Where'd you get the money to buy
all those presents you sent me? You a bit crooked too? Did you steal some of it?
Grant
No, ma'am.
Billie
Ma'am? Ha! I ain't some old lady - Call me Billie.
Grant
Ok Billie.
Billie
So out with it. What's with all the gifts? Did you beg, borrow or steal?
Grant
I'm from a wealthy family. I used my allowance.
Billie
That's quite an allowance you get.
Grant
Do you not like what I got you? I heard these were your favorite flowers...
and the guy at the store said these are the chocolates you'd buy there.
Billie
Oh my goodness gracious! I have myself a genuine stalker!
Grant
No ma'am. I mean, no Billie. It's not like that.
Billie
You come to all my shows, you sneak around to all the places I go and find out what I buy...
who knows where else you've followed me. You're a stalker.
Grant
Please don't say that. I'm sorry. I meant to be a gentleman. I wanted to impress you.
Billie
Oh don't worry. I don't mid stalkers, especially cute ones like you.
Grant
Oh Billie... could I...
(He moves toward her but he gets shy and stops- she moves closer to him)
Billie
Could you what?
(He pulls a pen and paper from his pocket)
Grant
Get your autograph?
(Billie laughs)
Billie
That's the least I could do.
(She signs his autograph book and blows on it sexually)
Billie (Cont.)
That all you want?
Grant
I don't know. I never thought I'd get to meet you like this. I always wanted to.
I always fantasize about it. I mean dream... I mean... this is so hard.
Billie
Just relax. I'm not gonna bite.
Grant
I was so much smoother when I imagined this.
Billie
What were you going to do?
Grant
I was going to waltz in here and walk up behind you as you were doing your hair
and look at you through the mirror and smile and say, "Did you like the flowers?"
I take one a put it in your hair. And you smile and say, "They're my favorite."
Then I'd take your hand and kiss it and say "my name is Humphrey Grant."
And you'd blush... for some reason you were the shy one in my fantasy.
(She pretends to be shy and holds out her hand. He takes it and kisses it)
Billie
See that wasn't so difficult.
Grant
Thank you for seeing me. You're very kind.
Billie
Not really. I'm not a very good person but you're a very nice boy
and I respect that and want to treat you kindly for some reason.
Maybe it's all the flowers and perfume but I just want to be nice to you.
Just this once though.
Grant
I understand.
Billie
Don't be sad. I just don't think this would work out for us.
We're from two different worlds and mine ain't fit for a nice young man like you.
I'm not the good person you fantasized about. Go find yourself a nice girl.
Grant
I doubt there's any girl as great as you.
Billie
The only girl who's great is that fantasy one in your head. Even I can't live up to her.
(She gives him a little kiss. He is in heaven)
Billie (Cont.)
That's all you're getting. Now get out of here before I call security you little stalker.
Grant
Yes, ma'am.
Billie
Watch it.
Grant
Ok Billie.
(He gives her a little wave and she blows him a kiss. He catches the kiss and puts it in his pocket and goes)
(Billie turns back to her mirror and sings her song "You can't take that away from me")
Billie
The way you wear your hat
The way you sip your tea
The memory of all that
No, no they can't take that away from me
The way your smile just beams
The way you sing off key
The way you haunt my dreams
No, no they can't take that away from me
We may never, never meet again
On the bumpy road to love
Still I'll always, always keep the memory of
The way you hold your knife
The way we danced till three
The way you changed my life
No, no they can't take that away from me
No, they can't take that away from me
We may never, never meet again
On that bumpy road to love
Still I'll always, always keep the memory of
The way you hold your knife
The way we danced till three
The way you change my life
No, no they can't take that away from me
No, they can't take that away from me
END
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.jpg "short play script for two actors - duologue for man and woman - Historical fiction musical romance - Billie Holiday")