MYSTERY OF THE GANGSTER GHOST
by D. M. Larson
A murder mystery
with songs
and multiple endings
(The stage is nearly empty except for a chair, a table and
desk lamp that is pointed in HENRY’s face. The lights go
out for total darkness and then the lamp snaps on and HENRY
is in the chair looking nervous. Two detectives appear,
PETE and ELIOT, along with MAYA the psychic)
ACT 1 SCENE 1 - BONNIE AND CLYDE
PETE
All right, you. I’m gonna give you
one more chance to spill the beans
or we’re gonna toss you in the
slammer and throw away the key.
ELIOT
Easy there, detective. Henry here
is ready to tell us all about
Bonnie and Hyde.
HENRY
Clyde.
ELIOT
See. He’s very cooperative.
HENRY
And what are you going to do if I
don’t spill the beans?
PETE
Then this psychic here, Madame
Maya, is gonna read your mind.
HENRY
So what do you want to know?
ELIOT
What was Clyde’s real name? I have
here a series aliases: Roy Bailey,
Jack Hale, Eldin Williams, Elvin
Williams and Donald the Duck.
HENRY
His real name was Clyde Barrow.
PETE
What was his middle name?!
HERNY
I don’t remember!
MAYA
He liked to go by Tiberius but it
was actually Chestnut.
HENRY
Hey, I think that’s right. Maybe
you should ask her all the
questions.
PETE
Don’t get smart with me.
ELIOT
So what was Clyde like as a kid?
HENRY
He stole jalopies and took them for
joy rides.
ELIOT
So what was Clyde’s first crime?
HENRY
He and Bonnie robbed a bank in
Missouri and got away with $115.
PETE
That’s it?
HENRY
The banks don’t have much money
anymore. It’s the Great Depression remember?
ELIOT
True.
PETE
We know he was bank robber. Didn’t
he also take hostages and torture them?
HENRY
Well, there was this one time he
kidnapped a cop and made him steal
a car battery and install it before
we let him go.
PETE
He also killed 13 people!
HENRY
I don’t know if it was that many.
MAYA
It was more like six.
HENRY
Look. I told you everything I know.
I helped you find them. Aren’t I
free to go?
PETE
Well, you’ve been cleared of all
your charges in Texas, but you’re
still wanted in Oklahoma for grand
theft auto.
HENRY
What? How long do I have to be in
jail for stealing car?
MAYA
Twelve years and then when you get
out you’ll be hit by a train.
HENRY
What?! Wait!
PETE
Get him out of here.
(Detective ELIOT removes HENRY)
MAYA
So how many people did you arrest
for helping Bonnie and Clyde?
PETE
Twenty-three.
MAYA
Twenty-three! Are you sure?
PETE
Yes, why?
MAYA
Did you know Bonnie was 23 when she
was killed? And they were killed
on May 23.
PETE
You’re right!
MAYA
Of course I’m right. And out of
167 bullets fired. 50 hit Bonnie
and Clyde... 23 of those just hit Bonnie.
PETE
Now, now. I don’t know about that.
MAYA
And she had twenty-three pennies in
her purse at her time of death.
PETE
Get her out of here.
(Detective ELIOT comes in a drags out the MAYA)
PETE (CONT.)
Dang, now she has me curious. I’m
gonna have to go look in her purse.
END OF SCENE
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