“You Make Me Look Skinnier”
By D. M. Larson
(ECHO sits reading a book. REGINA enters listening to music and dancing all cool. She bumps into ECHO who drops his book. REGINA keeps dancing. ECHO frowns)
REGINA
What’s wrong, Echo?
ECHO
Nothing.
REGINA
Are you still sad about lunch?
ECHO
No.
REGINA
It must be hard to be so little, but it’s for the best. It’s good you’re not tall enough to reach the cake in the lunch line. You certainly don’t need any more cake with a figure like that.
ECHO
Okay, Regina.
REGINA
I’m just trying to help you, Echo.
ECHO
I know.
REGINA
And I like hanging out with you. You make me look skinnier.
ECHO
Very funny.
REGINA
What’s the matter, Echo? Did I hurt your feelings? You really need to learn to take a joke. That’s what friends do. They joke around and tease each other.
ECHO
They do?
REGINA
Sure, I’m always teasing my friends about who has the nicer clothes and the better hair and the cooler sunglasses.
ECHO
It’s usually you. You’re the one with the nice clothes and hair and sunglasses.
REGINA
I know. I’m awesome like that.
ECHO
So when you were joking with me, you wanted to be my friend?
REGINA
Well, let’s not get too carried away. Maybe when you stop being so… weird.
ECHO
Then why are you talking to me, Regina?
REGINA
I need you to do my homework. But make sure mine is different than yours so the teacher doesn’t get. Give me more right answers.
ECHO
Oh, that won’t make the teacher suspicious.
REGINA
Just do it okay.
ECHO
And what do I get out of it?
REGINA
I’ll let you hang out at lunch with me again.
ECHO
So you can make fun of how fat I am?
REGINA
That again? Get over it.
ECHO
I don’t want to be your friend anymore.
REGINA
You don’t want me to be your enemy, Echo. You’ve seen the nice me, because you’ve helped me with my homework.
ECHO
Helped you? I did it for you. And what did I get out of it? Fat jokes.
REGINA
Maybe if you weren’t so fat, I wouldn’t make so many jokes.
ECHO
Just leave me alone, Regina.
REGINA
You stop doing my homework and I’ll never leave you alone again. I’ll make your every day a living hell. How about we start with Facebook?
(REGINA gets out her phone)
ECHO
What are you doing?
REGINA
I have a picture of you from gym class. I bet everyone will think it’s hilarious.
ECHO
Don’t you dare!
(ECHO tries to take REGINA’s phone but REGINA holds it up out of reach)
REGINA
Too bad you’re so short and fat. You can’t jump up high enough.
(ECHO stomps on her foot instead and REGINA screams and drops her phone. ECHO grabs it)
ECHO
Why did you take these pictures?
REGINA
I thought they might be useful.
ECHO
You’re sick.
REGINA
And you’re dead.
(REGINA goes for ECHO)
ECHO
I’ll smash your phone if you touch me.
REGINA
You wouldn’t dare.
(ECHO holds phone up high like she is going to throw it down hard)
ECHO
Stay back.
(REGINA backs down)
REGINA
Whatever. Go ahead and smash it. My parents will just buy me a new phone.
ECHO
At least I can get rid of these pictures.
REGINA
They’re in the cloud. You’ll never get rid of them.
ECHO
I’ll sue you if you post any of them.
REGINA
What?
ECHO
Maybe you’ll even go to jail.
REGINA
What you talking about?
ECHO
It’s called fat shaming, Regina. People get in big trouble for this.
REGINA
You won’t do it. You don’t have the guts.
ECHO
Try me.
REGINA
Echo, I’m going to give you one more chance to do my homework. We all have bad days. You’re just a little extra emotional today. I understand. Do this homework, give me back my phone and we’ll pretend none of this happened, okay?
(REGINA holds out her hand and ECHO looks at the phone unsure what to do)
NOW YOU DECIDE
What do you think Echo will do?
(class discussion or audience participation)
OPTIONAL: Have actors improv what class/audience feels will happen next
Please leave your feedback and thoughts on this script in the comments below.
