This scene is from the play "Holka Polka"
For permission to use "PIG NOSE PRINCESSES" (scene for 5 actors) contact doug@freedrama.net
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EZI (off)
Cindy!
CINDY
Oh, no. It's them.
DEZI (off)
Where is she?
WOLF
Who are they?
CINDY
My sisters.
(EZI and DEZI enter. They are princesses too and wear exaggerated princess costumes, a sharp contrast to CINDY's tasteful costume)
EZI
Where have you been?
DEZI
No one told you that you could run off like that.
CINDY
I'm sorry.
(They mock her)
EZI and DEZI
"I'm sorry."
EZI
That's all she ever says.
DEZI
We need a little less sorry and a little more obedience.
CINDY
Sorry.
WOLF
Don't be sorry. These two need show a little respect.
(WOLF steps between CINDY and EZI and DEZI)
EZI
What is that?
DEZI
Looks like a stray dog.
CINDY
This is Mr. Fuzzy.
EZI
Don't name it.
DEZI
Then you'll want to feed it.
WOLF
You two look tasty.
EZI
What?
DEZI
I never!
(BRENDA steps between them all)
BRENDA
Please, everyone. Let's calm down.
(BRENDA turns to EZI and DEZI)
BRENDA (CONT.)
Hello, princesses. I'm Brenda.
EZI
Brenda?
DEZI
Never heard of you.
BRENDA
I'm the daughter of Splenda. The good witch of the South.
EZI
Splenda?
DEZI
Witch?
CINDY
Oh, Splenda's so beautiful. I wish had her hair.
EZI
Ha! Never.
DEZI
Not with the head of straw.
(WOLF growls and CINDY calms him with a scratch on the ear)
BRENDA
So you two know the prince?
EZI
Know him? Ha.
DEZI
I'm practically engaged to him.
EZI
You wish.
DEZI
Don't you dare make moves on my man.
BRENDA
Terrible thing about the sleeping spell. Any idea why someone might do it?
EZI
Maybe they were worried their sister was trying to take their man.
DEZI
But he is my man.
EZI
Since when?
DEZI
Since he gave me that rose at the ball.
EZI
Gave you a rose? He knocked over a vase and spilled it all over your shoes.
DEZI
It's the thought that counts.
BRENDA
So do either you play with magic? Sleeping spells?
EZI
Watch it, witch.
DEZI
We know where you're going with this.
CINDY
Please, Brenda. My sisters would never do anything to the Prince. They both love him so.
EZI
Hush up, Cindy. No one was talking to you.
DEZI
Yeah, zip it or we whip it.
BRENDA
I hope that's a figure of speech.
EZI
We find that a good whipping keeps little girls in line.
DEZI
Why? What are you going to do about it?
EZI
Yeah, wonder witch. Gonna cast a spell on us?
DEZI
Gonna turn us into toads?
WOLF
Too late for that.
(CINDY giggles a little at the WOLF's joke. EZI and DEZI grab her in anger)
EZI
You think that's funny?
DEZI
I think she needs a little time out.
EZI
In the dungeon!
DEZI
In chains!
(EZI and DEZI start to drag CINDY out but BRENDA and WOLF block their exit)
BRENDA
Let her go.
EZI
Stay out of this.
DEZI
This is a family problem.
BRENDA
But you're hurting her.
WOLF
Let her go or answer to Mr. Fuzzy.
(EZI and DEZI mock them)
EZI
Oh, I'm so scared.
DEZI
Big Bad Wolf and Wimpy Witch have got us cornered.
CINDY
Please, Brenda. Please, Mr. Fuzzy. I'll be okay.
EZI
That's what you think.
(She pulls CINDY's hair)
CINDY
Ow!
DEZI
Now keep quiet.
BRENDA
That's it!
(There is a crash of thunder as BRENDA takes out her wand. Everyone stops. BRENDA does her dance and music plays. Pulls out her wand)
EZI
Oh, no.
DEZI
She wouldn't.
BRENDA
Holka polka!
(Zap sound and lights go black)
CINDY
What happened?
WOLF
I can't see again.
BRENDA
Why does that always happen?
(Oinking is heard)
CINDY
What's that?
WOLF
Hmmm. Sounds like bacon, I mean pigs.
BRENDA
We need some lights. Holka polka!
(Lights come back on and there are two stuffed pigs by CINDY)
CINDY
Pigs!
BRENDA
Ooops.
CINDY
You turned my sisters into pigs.
BRENDA
I guess I kind of flipped out. Sorry. I'll change them back.
WOLF
But I haven't had a bite to eat all day.
BRENDA
You will not eat the pig princesses.
CINDY
I don't mind.
BRENDA
No, no. I better change them back before I get in trouble.
CINDY
Trouble? Aren't witches supposed to do things like this?
BRENDA
I'm not. (DING sounds is heard) Dang it. Too late.
WOLF
So can I eat them?
BRENDA
No. I'm changing them back anyway. Holka polka!
(Music. Blackout. EZI and DEZI are heard screaming)
CINDY
Oh, they're mad. You should have left them as pigs.
EZI
What did you do to us?
(EZI and DEZI snort like pigs after each thing they say)
DEZI
Yeah, what's going on?
(Snort)
EZI
I can't see!
(Snort)
DEZI
Cindy, do something!
(Snort)
BRENDA
Holka polka! (Lights come on and EZI and DEZI have pig noses) Oh, no.
EZI
Let's get out of here.
(Snort)
DEZI
Agreed.
(Snort)
(EZI and DEZI rush off stage)
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